Formula Oppo: The Nissin Grand Prix on Titan Update

"Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire" (arch-duke-maxyenko)
10/03/2014 at 16:10 • Filed to: fo

What are these people running from? They're not! They're running to the World's Toughest Competition in Town! It's the 15th round of !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! ! The only officially unlicensed Formula 1 youpickem game of this corner of Jalopnik.com known as Oppositelock! This week we travel to the island in the sun!

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!!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! , Lewis-san had an incredible race between himself and his tires. Nico-san's car racka disciprine and left the race due to electrical issues within the first few laps. While Lewis-san was racing against his tires he pulled out a herculean effort to build a huge gap that was then taken away when he was forced to pit. Sebastian-san then took over the lead but was quickly dispatched by Lewis-san. Sebastian-san would finish second with Capitan Crest finishing 3rd.

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So, how many people think that the sport made a mistake of mandating turbo-charged V6's? Well, you're wrong! This year has produced some of the most exciting racing in the last decade. When the cars powertrains remain the same for too long, the emphasis is taken away from the mechanical engineers and placed on the aerodynamicists like Newey, which makes for boring racing. So, with the races being exciting this year, will Lewis maintain his championship lead? Will the silver arrows be blunted yet again by nibbles? Can Capitan Crest continue to combat cavities, keeping championship chances cognizant? Will Vettel get another good finish? Will Williams get their third place in the constructer's title back from Ferrari? Will Alonso amaze? Can Kimi figure out his Ferrari? Will Kamui Kobayashi score a home victory or will he bring great shame upon his family? Is this all just meaningless filler? Find out those answers and more next time on Formula Oppo!

The drivers for greater glory!

Sebastian Vettel- Red Bull

Daniel Ricciardo- Red Bull

Max Chilton Alexander Rossi- Marussia

Jules Bianchi- Marussia

Nico Rosberg- Mercedes

Lewis Hamilton- Mercedes

Kimi Räikkönen- Ferrari

Fernando Alonso- Ferrari

Romain Grosjean- Lotus

Pastor Maldonado- Lotus

(Marcus Ericsson- Caterham)?

(Kamui Kobayashi or Andre Lotterer Mystery Guest - Caterham)?

Sergio Perez- Force India

Nico Hulkenberg- Force India

Felipe Massa- Williams

Valtteri Bottas- Williams

Kevin Magnussen- McLaren

Jenson Button- McLaren

Esteban Gutierrez- Sauber

Adrian Sutil- Sauber

Jean-Eric Vergne- Toro Rosso

Daniil Kvyat- Toro Rosso

My picks for the great racing results?

1. Lewis Hamilton

2. Nico Rosberg

3. Daniel Ricciardo

Q. Lewis Hamilton

Curse: Kamui Kobayashi will bring great shame upon his family.

You have until Q1, (Saturday 4th at 1:00 am est) to make your picks or you will fail this quest!

and my thoughts go out to the victims of the Mount Ontake eruption.

DISCUSSION (52)

Gated Manual > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
09/27/2014 at 14:38

1. HAM

2. ROS

3. BOT

Q. HAM

Curse: Crashtor will continue his streak on mashing up the Lotus.

Tim (Fractal Footwork) > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
09/27/2014 at 18:26

1. Hamilton

2. Rosberg

3. Ricciardo

Q. Hamilton

I'm foreseeing a good weekend for Red Bull at Suzuka

Haimatox > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
09/27/2014 at 18:54

1. Ham

2. Ros

3. Ric

Q. Ham

I'm noticing a trend again...

TxBrumski > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
09/27/2014 at 19:24

1. Hamilton

2. Rosberg

3. Button

Q. Rosberg

Curse: Rosberg will lose 1st place to Hamilton after arguing on the radio with his pit engineer over whether they should be called the "S Curves" or the "ß Curves".

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > TxBrumski
09/27/2014 at 19:26

That's not a curse,

TxBrumski > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
09/27/2014 at 19:56

Curse of being German and using that weird character for the "ssss" sound.

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > TxBrumski
09/27/2014 at 20:10

But for the purposes of this competition, it's no curse.

kinjasignedmeout > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
09/27/2014 at 20:37

1. Rosberg

2. Vettel

3. Button

Q. Hamilton

Sergio SVeron > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
09/28/2014 at 14:25

1 Nico

2 Vettel

3 Bottas

Q Nico

Curse: Hamilton car will set on fire during Qualification

GhostZ > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
09/28/2014 at 16:03

Kinja'd!!!

I'm going to guess that there are "speed boost" pads and lava traps on this track too, right?

PS9 > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
09/28/2014 at 16:06

No blue Turtle Shell?

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > GhostZ
09/28/2014 at 16:06

Yes to speed boosts. Probably some lava from the volcano erupting

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > PS9
09/28/2014 at 16:07

The Nintendo GP was 2 races ago.

Brian Silvestro > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
09/29/2014 at 11:51

That lead picture is a masterpiece. And yes, it is usually all pointless filler.

1. Hamilton

2. Rosberg

3. Vettel

Q. Hamilton

ncasolowork2 > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
09/29/2014 at 12:02

Q: Hamilton Lewis-sensei

1) Hamilton Lewis-sensei

2) Ricciardo Daniel-sensei

3) Alonso Fernando-sensei

Did I ever get my curse points for Singapore and cursing the full race distance?

TxBrumski > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
09/29/2014 at 14:28

Well dang... Alright, Nico's steering wheel wiring loom will fail again because, like most things on the Japanese coast, it has been "contaminated". Curse of the contamination?

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > ncasolowork2
09/29/2014 at 14:39

The curse is only for drivers, so no points.

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > TxBrumski
09/29/2014 at 14:41

You have Rosberg finishing 2nd and not exiting the race, so you can't curse him.

TxBrumski > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
09/29/2014 at 15:39

I'll curse him just to see Lewis take first. His steering wheel might fail for only 30 seconds, you never know...

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > TxBrumski
09/29/2014 at 17:22

No. You get no curse. Please refer to the rules.

TxBrumski > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
09/29/2014 at 17:23

AAAGGGHHH I CAN NEVER WIN!!!

Bobololo23 is waiting for the FT86 to come > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
09/30/2014 at 09:00

1.HAM

2.ROS

3.MAS

Q.HAM

Cebu > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
09/30/2014 at 17:37

Needs more anime gifs.

JEM > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
09/30/2014 at 17:40

1. Lewis Hamilton

2. Nico Rosberg

3. Sebastian Vettel

Q. Lewis Hamilton

Fred (FreddsterExprs) > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
10/01/2014 at 10:26

1. Hamilton

2. Rosberg

3. Bottas

Q: HAM

hike > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
10/01/2014 at 19:06

1. Massa

2. Ham

3. Riccardo

Q. Rosberg

Curse: Rosberg

I don't know why, but I just feel like his car will fail again. Seems to be having some bad luck like Hamilton had earlier in the year. Also, this track has a lot of long straights, which should benefit the Williams.

RTeeJay > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
10/01/2014 at 20:51

1. Hamilton

2. Ricciardo

3. Rosberg

Q. Hamilton

Curse. Maldonado

Bandit > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
10/02/2014 at 14:20

Ham

Ros

Ric

Q. Ham

Agrajag > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
10/02/2014 at 14:29

1. Rosberg

2. Ricciardo

3. Vettel

Q. Hamilton

DoomBuggie > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
10/02/2014 at 19:36

I'll probably regret locking in my answers before practice has even started but here it is:

Ricciardo
Rosberg
Raikonnen

Chosen solely on the fact that I like alliteration and the letter R. Can I curse a whole team? If so I curse Caterham (as much as I hate to do that). Either both cars are going to fail/crash before the end of the race or the company will be dissolved and its assets confiscated by creditors before they can enjoy starting in 21st and 22nd position on the grid for the 900th time.

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > DoomBuggie
10/02/2014 at 20:20

pick one of the two drivers

DoomBuggie > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
10/03/2014 at 01:21

Koboyashi...for the curse that is.

DoomBuggie > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
10/03/2014 at 01:35

Just realized I forgot to pick someone for qualifying. Let's go with Hamilton.

Lachlan - #ForzaJules > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
10/03/2014 at 15:29

Ham

Ros

Vet

Q: Ham

EL_ULY > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
10/03/2014 at 16:18

SOR .Q

MAH .1

SOR .2

CIR .3

KnowsAboutCars > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
10/03/2014 at 16:23

1. Rosberg

2. Hamilton

3. Bottas

Q. Rosberg

For Sweden > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
10/03/2014 at 16:56

1. ROS

2. HAM

3. BOS

Q. HAM

PushToStart > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
10/03/2014 at 16:58

Q. Hamilton

1. Hamilton

2. Rosberg

3. Vettel

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > For Sweden
10/03/2014 at 17:38

I take it that 3 is Bottas?

For Sweden > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
10/03/2014 at 17:40

Yes.

But in my home, he goes by Bossat.

F1Fan426 > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
10/03/2014 at 18:39

I don't know why I didn't find this competition sooner.. So, with this being my first time playing this, so I'm going to go out there on a limb and throw out a crazy response for my 3rd place. I think it will go

1. Hamilton

2. Rosberg

3. Bottas

Q: Hamilton

Curse: Damn.. I chose Gutierrez

pirates-ecu > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
10/03/2014 at 23:06

1. Lewis, - the sandwich- hamilton
2. Nico "NEIN THE ENGLISHMAN HAS TAKEN THE CHAMPIONSHIP LEAD. NEIN NEIN NEIN Roseberg
3. Daniel, Women love the teeth - Ricciardo

Quali... Hamilton, even though he just stuffed the front corner at the end of fp3.

Will this be the week that Pirates-ecu sneaks into first. I am only 10 points out......

pirates-ecu > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
10/03/2014 at 23:48

are we allowed to tweak ourpics before quali? Or am I locked in. its only 11:48

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > pirates-ecu
10/03/2014 at 23:51

once they're in, they're in

pirates-ecu > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
10/03/2014 at 23:52

thanks for the quick reply that's what i thought....

BTW check out

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Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > pirates-ecu
10/03/2014 at 23:53

WUT

pirates-ecu > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
10/03/2014 at 23:56

going to be an interesting time listening to the old nbcsports team for quali.... The silly season plot thickens.....

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > pirates-ecu
10/03/2014 at 23:57